Woman With Excess Weight

What makes you feel shame?

It’s probably a biological response that is built in that makes us want to be part of a “tribe”. When we lived in caves, our very survival depended upon being accepted as part of a group. It’s probably true that “No man or woman was an island” back then. When someone points out some way that you don’t conform to their “norm”, that can make you feel ashamed. But you will probably only feel that way if you are already insecure about yourself.

Perhaps that’s the reason that advertisement works so effectively. You see that others are wearing, eating, driving or doing an activity, and, in your subconscious mind, you feel that you too, must do the same.

Brene Brown, Ph.D, writes about shame, and its effect. It’s not something that people want to discuss because it’s so hurtful and long lasting. In fact, many people try to ignore it. She estimated that 90{5b8e831512cf0c284f7edae7fc403e9a09e5b1736c5b1d60e4451a29dc064ebe} of the women she interviewed had body shame issues. Whether thin or overweight, too big, or too little, women had insecurities about their body.

For many women, that has led to the slippery slope of dieting. Years later, women report that they began dieting when they were already thin.

“You can never to too rich or too thin”  

It sure didn’t work for Whitney Houston: rich and thin…  But, this was a popular saying that encouraged women to extreme diets and excessive exercise. It also began them on their journey to overweight. Each time you diet, your metabolism slows down, and eventually leads to regaining the weight. After a number of times in this pattern, a yo-yo response is created. Lose weight, and then gain it back. Each time the weight is regained, additional weight comes along. It’s a kind of insurance policy that the body creates to prevent you from starving! It’s nature’s design to preserve life.

This obsession with dieting is making millions of women miserable, and creates the very problem that you want to avoid! Gaining weight is the result of chronic dieting. When you deprive yourself, you are more likely to binge at some time when you are stressed out!

But how do you break out of this pattern? It’s by accepting yourself right now. Don’t wait until you are thin. You must change your mindset which is creating a stressful physiological response in your body. Learn to be your own best friend, and best supporter.

When you finally relax, and start nurturing yourself, your cortisol level drops, and you can begin on a path to happy weight. The bottom line is: You can starve yourself, berate and hate your body, and it will only add to your weight. Or you can nurture yourself, and accept yourself, and have a chance to be happy and healthy – and then, have the possibility of losing the weight – and KEEPING it off!

EFT Tapping is an amazing tool that helps release the negative emotions of shame. You have to try it to see how effective it is!


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